I recently told my stepmother that I would be happy if nothing ever changed. The more I thought about it, the more I realized it wasn’t true. It’s uncertainty that makes me uncomfortable. I can actually adjust to change fairly well, once I know what it entails.
Without question, my life is going to change, has already changed. I lost my job, and I don’t know what will happen next. It will be, in fact, a big fat surprise. I will never find another job, and end up homeless, pushing Daisy and Louie down the street in a shopping cart. Or, I could land a fabulous job that makes me happier than I have ever been, with fulfilling work for which I am richly and justly rewarded. Or, more likely, a scenario that falls somewhere between the two, hopefully closer to rich rewards than shopping cart.
My days have already changed dramatically. Instead of getting up super early and rushing off to work, I rise at a respectively early time, and start my day with a fairly vigorous workout. A great change! I eat a healthy breakfast (no change), and start a semi-structured day that includes looking and applying for jobs, networking, taking classes from the placement agency, writing, working on the house and yard, and visiting with friends or family. As much as I look forward to getting a new job, I can’t say that this current situation is bad, just a little anxious. But truthfully, it may not surpass the level of anxiety I had at my former worksite, where the environment had been tumultuous for a steady period of time.
Right now, I am considering a scenario that would result in significant change, the most change I have ever experienced. I won’t go in to detail here, the ball is not currently in my court, but trust me if it happens, YOU will be the 12th to know! But it’s a change that I might not have even considered in the past, which now leaves me sort of tingly with anticipation and excitement at the possibilities. Maybe change could be a great thing, the key to greater happiness?
The Magic 8 Ball isn’t working for me. I have no earthly way of knowing which direction I am going. But instead of feeling too worried about it, I find myself sort of interestingly waiting to see what’s going to happen next. I continue to put as much positive energy and action as I can towards rowing that boat to a fruitful shore, but I’m not wearing the life jacket. I’m ready to dive in, swim like hell for the beach and start whatever next grand adventure this crazy life wants to hand me. In fact, I am ready to change!
The end, for now